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Addendum (just in case I forget): Shout-out to User:BrianME for his alternate Ozark series.

Part 2: The Drive & Student Orientation

The next day, at 4:00 AM, William is fast asleep in his bed, when Violette barges into his bedroom with an airhorn.


William (Startled): "WHAT!"

Violette: "Time to leave for the airport. We decided to book a flight instead of drive, so get moving!"

Two hours pass, as the Violette1st family arrive at Baltimore-Washington International Airport. When they reach the TSA line, William has a meltdown.

William: "I don't want to put away my phone, you scrub!"

TSA Officer: "Sir, if you don't put your phone in the bin for screening, I'll have to call security!"

William decides to comply. When the three got to the main concourse area, William starts to get hungry.

William: "MOM! Get me food! NOW!"

Violette: "Here, you can have some raisins from my purse."

Bill: "I love me some raisins!"

William: "No way! Raisins are for scrubs! Where's Andy?"

Bill: "Oh, that lazy man slept in. Since he's not on punishment I figured we'd leave him alone."

PA Announcer: "Southwest Airlines flight 599 from Baltimore to St. Louis is now boarding!"

William: "You didn't tell me we were flying Southwest! That airline is for scrubs. Why can't we fly United Airlines? If we did that, we would be escorted off the flight in a gruesome manner to where we would never make it to Missouri!"

Violette: "But-Southwest-is-the-only-airline-that-flies-directly-from-here-to-St.-Louis. (Violette talking Gibberish)

The long, 2.5-hour flight to St. Louis was a nightmare for William, because Southwest Airlines planes do not have any TVs to play XBOX on.

The car-ride to Neosho was even more gruesome, as Wi-Fi was very poor for most of the drive. William continuously kicked the driver's seat as he wanted to go home. Eventually, they arrived at Ozark Bible Institute when Bill exploded.

Bill: "Kick that seat one more time and we'll add another two years to your stay here!" (Note: He's staying for 4 years) "Now get out of the car!"

William continued squirming as Bill and Violette struggled to take him to the main building. Before reaching the front door, a Residential Assistant stops them.

Residential Assistant: "Sorry, but if he's enrolling at the college, he can't be dressed in a T-shirt and athletic shorts. Here's a dress shirt with slacks, a tie and a belt."

Violette: "Thank you."

After William changed, they headed back to the main building.

William: "I don't wanna wear dress shoes, I wanna relax in my T-shirt!"

Bill: "Deal with it, jerk! The man said this attire is required at all times."

When the Violette1st family go inside the building, they are greeted by the college president.

College President: "Welcome to Ozark Bible Institute! And who do we have here?"

Bill: "This is William. I heard about this place having strict rules, so we sent him to this college as a punishment. He behaves very badly at home."

College President: "I see. I'm sure with strict guidelines and PLENTY of required events, he'll straighten up during his four years on campus."

After ten full minutes of arguing between the family, the President of Ozark Bible Institute speaks on the microphone. Violette and Bill leave off back to Maryland.


To be continued in Part 3

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